I tried every which way to choose a different word. I tried to come up with a word that meant the same thing. I tried to talk myself out of this word…because it’s not a pretty word. I’m not going to find this word etched into a rock or hanging on a necklace. My word for 2018 won’t be on a christmas ornament or painted on a plaque for my book shelf. It just isn’t that kind of word. But no matter how I tried, I couldn’t let it go. It’s my word for 2018 and I’m stickin’ to it.
DETACH
See, I told you. It’s not pretty is it? It will probably get me some concerned looks and some blank stares. But that’s OK, cause I’m super excited about it anyway.
I was introduced to detachment many years ago. Another word for it is boundaries. Detachment takes boundaries to another level, one that I’m ready for.
Detachment, although harsh sounding, I’ve discovered, is one of the greatest forms of LOVE there is. In fact when I tried to choose another word instead of detach, love was the closest thing I could come up with.
Detachment, according to the dictionary, means “separation.” Embrace means to “come together.” How can we do both at the same moment? I believe that we can’t really come together without embracing the willingness to lovingly detach.
Detachment is:
- being peaceful rather than right
- not being dependent on others for good feelings
- never letting someone else control how we think, feel or act
- living one’s own life while letting friends and family live as they choose
- a sure way of expressing unconditional love
- giving up our fear about another person’s journey
- making no one a project
- allowing God to be God
and so much more!
I’ve learned so much about detachment in 2017 but the truth is I have a LONG way to go. Detachment takes practice…a lot of it!
I want to be able to live MY life to the fullest because I’m allowing others’ to do the same. I don’t want to take away any part of someone else’s journey in this life because I’ve stepped in to rescue or fix what is only their responsibility.
But mostly, I want to LOVE like I’ve never loved before. Detaching means that I don’t judge or try to control or allow anyones actions to determine my thoughts, feelings or behaviors. Tough one? YES! That’s why I chose the word. This seeming paradox – embracing (bringing near us) detachment (separation)- holds the key to my inner peace and those around me as well.
So there you have it, my word for 2018…DETACH.
If you’re with me, and you see me doing the opposite, feel free to nudge me and whisper “detach Letha” in my ear. My husband has already practiced that one as I’ve been working on detachment for some time.
I am starting a new 12 week course “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron. It’s a course to help me discover and develop my creativity in writing and so much more. Last night I was reading the forward of the book and I read this;
“When we engage in a creative recovery, we enter into a withdrawal process from life as we know it. Withdrawal is another way of saying detachment or non attachment which is emblematic of consistent work with any meditation practice. Many of us find that we have squandered our own creative energies by investing disproportionately in the lives, hopes, dreams, plans of others. Their lives have obscured and detoured our own. As we consolidate a core through our withdrawal process, we become more able to articulate our own boundaries, dreams and authentic goals. Our personal flexibility increases while our malleability to the whims of others decreases. We experience a heightened sense of possibility.”
And there you have it. The first day of 2018, when I thought I wouldn’t see my word anywhere, it was on page 6 of a brand new book I waited to start in the new year! How cool is that?
I hope you won’t mind me sharing throughout this year as I read and learn and practice detachment. Hopefully, you’ll even notice a difference in my writing.
So Happy New Year to you and yours and I hope you’ll have breakthrough and more love because of the word you chose for 2018.
detaching with love,
Letha
